i did it again.

i did it again today.i cried again.OMG i hate crying.but i dont know how to stop it.
we were in the car on our way to the kubur and everybody is talking to everybody except they didnt talk to me.as if i was invisible.and they were talking about me.right in front of my face.as if i cant hear anything.gosh!i hate this!

kak ngah wants to go to this concert with mawi as the main performer and mak said ok.OMG kenape aku takleh lupe perkara ni????????siot betul aku benci!benci!benci!

i miss arwah ayah.he used to ask me wether or not i'm ok in the car while others were talking.arwah ayah used to hold my hand sebab suke² while we were in the car.i miss hugging ayah if i feel like crying without him noticing that i wanted to cry at that moment.i miss kissing ayah's cheek for saje².i miss ayah who always call me names like jenahak or kak langkawi or twenty p.even though the names are lame but it's special.neither kak yong,kak ngah or luqman have names like that.ayah didnt give them any special names.ayah always made me feel special.i miss you,dad.u're the greatest dad in the whole wide world.i love you.Al-fatihah.

ya TUHAN,aku tahu ini adalah lagi satu dugaan.aku akan tabah mengharunginya.aku berdoa utk yang terbaik.amiin.